Confucius Say...

Confucius Say...."Virgin like balloon: one prick, all gone. Woman pilot who fly upside down have crack up. Man who lays girl in field gets piece on earth. Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed. Man who have hole in pocket feels cocky all day. He who fishes in other mans well often catches crabs. Wife who puts man in dog house may find him in cat house. Boy who goes to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand. Girl should not marry basketball player: he dribbles before he shoot. Woman who springs on innerspring this spring gets offspring next spring. He who runs behind the car will get exhausted. Man who walk backwards through turnstile going to Bangkok. Man who put cream in tart not necessarily pastry chef. Man doing push-up in long grass not necessarily exercise freak. Man who go to bed with problem on mind, wake up with solution in hand. Man who wait for women to call, wait long time. It easier to meet girl in park than park meat in girl. He who stand on toilet, high on pot. He who put dick in peanut butter, fucking nuts. Foolish man give wife grand piano, Wise man give wife upright organ. Man with one chopstick go hungry. Man who screws cook in pantry often gets ass in jam. Girl who douches with vinegar walk around with sour puss. Man who marries girl with no bust have right to feel low down. A satisfied virgin is a virgin no more. Man who play with sharp objects may not be man for long. All men eat, but Fu Manchu.  Australia Good Place to Put Chinese Restaurant. Boy who diddle little girl do diddly squat. Chemist who fall in acid, absorbed in work. Don't judge book by cover, but by how thick it is. Even the greatest whale is helpless in middle of desert. Girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy. Man who farts in church sits in his own pew. Girl who sit on brother-in-law's knee, make hard for sister. Girl who sit on jockey's knee get hot tip. Girl with back to fire warming whole of her body. Girl's best asset is her 'lie' ability. He who eat cookie in bed, will wake up feeling crumby. He who eat ice cream in car is a Sundae Driver. He who eat too many prunes, sit on toilet many moons. He who pull out too fast leave rubber behind. If chain still swinging, seat will be warm. If you park, don't drink, accidents cause people. If you turn an oriental around, he become disoriented. If you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient. Is good to learn how to masturbate, may come in handy! Is stuffy inside fortune cookie. Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed. It take a lot of balls to make a football team. It take many nails to build crib, one screw to fill it. Lady who live in glass house, dress in basement! Look for helping hand on end of own arm. Man and mouse alike, both end up in pussy. Man kicked in testicles, left holding bag. Man should never straddle barbed wire fences. Man trapped in pantry have butt in jam. Man trapped in whore house get jerked around. Man who abuse his computer get bad bytes! Man who buy drowned cat must pay for stinking wet pussy. Man who drive like hell bound to get there! Man who drop watch in whisky is wasting time. Man who eat photo of father, soon spitting image of father. Man fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.

Confucius Say...Squirrel lay on rock and crack nuts; man lay on crack and rock nuts. Baby conceived on back seat of automobile with automatic transmission grow up to be shiftless bastard. Bird in hand make it hard to blow nose. Man who lose key to girl friends apartment, no get new key. Woman who slides down bannister makes monkey shine. Man who go to sleep with itchy bottom wake up with smelly finger. Girl who is wallflower at party is dandelion in bed. Girl who marry detective must kiss dick. He who pass gas in church must sit in own pew. Keeping it in family sure sound incestuous. Man who go out with flat chested woman feel shallow. Man who have circumcision lose a bit of foresight. Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion! Man who jump through window screen, strain self. Man who lifts stones off woman get rocks off. Man who masturbate only screwing self. Man who polish knob play pocket pool. Man who pull out too soon get hit in rear end. Man who push piano down mine shaft get a flat miner. Man who put cock on stove have hot rod. Man who put foot in mouth get athlete's tongue. Man who put head in dryer bound to get sock in the mouth! Man who put head on railroad track get splitting headache. Man who read woman like book, prefer braille! Man who scratch butt should not bite fingernails! Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed. Man who sit on hot stove will rise again. Man who sit on tack get point! Man who step in it often say it. Man with forked tongue not need chop sticks. Man with hand in bush not necessarily trimming shrubs. Never raise hands to angry child, it leave groin exposed. Passionate kiss like spider web, lead to undoing of fly. Pentocostal who pass out get laid in church. People having gift for gab know not how to wrap it up. Secretary becomes permanent fixture when screwed on desk. Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts. Those who make love in strawberry patch have butt in jam. To prevent hangover stay drunk! When baby cry, give bust in face. When lady say maybe, she mean yes. When lady say no, she mean maybe. When lady say yes, she no lady. Woman who pounce on dead rooster go down on limp cock. Woman who put detergent on top shelf, Jump for Joy. Woman who spend much time on bedspring have offspring. Woman who turn back on lover get screwed over. Woman who wear G-string, high on crack! Woman with bleached blonde hair have black hair by cracky. Woman with cold hands have fire under skirt. Women fake orgasm, Men fake foreplay. Be careful of the toes you step on today, for they may be connected to the ass you have to kiss tomorrow."

"Confucius say too damn much!"

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